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Felt Like Home

by Teen Brides

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1.
Scratching The Surface 02:17
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2.
The Surface 03:16
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Some other day I hope I will learn How to express myself In a different way I will have enough courage To sing about what really aches And what's inside Will finally match the outside And I'll be able to reach And you'll be able to see And I'll fit in But as for now, I really don't know how To do it properly And not to feel So uncomfortable And so entirely unnatural So I ended up making a set Of new water metaphors instead And I sing about drowning again Though I've never drowned in my whole life I'm actually a pretty good swimmer At least a better one than a singer But swimming doesn't help much With things, I don't know how to talk directly about And so I wish I'll find a way But not today And I wish I could be a little less creative And stop hiding behind a foreign language Or at least learn how to use words like love non-ironically
3.
Through Deep Waters 03:41
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All my fears are non-existent They are drowning with my friends At the bottom of the ocean I know exactly when this all ends Come closer to me, free from the light When it gets dark, it feels more like home Best regards, it'll soon be over I only see you for what you were The room is full of liquid And I am thirsty as ever I know it's over I know it's over Stanger things have happened But not to me She's dead but not alone I'm getting out Without a sound Come to the surface With palms wide open My ship is sinking As I'm relearning to swim Alone With my only guide, an image Of something once unbroken That felt like home
4.
Housebreaking 04:40
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I'm sick and tired of myself Failing at housebreaking pets These pups now turn into wolves They are impossible to school Completely untrainable They shit all over the floor I just can't take it no more They've torn apart all my clothes And they just won't stop barking I have to put an end to it, one way or another Cut your right hand to save the rest I hope you know that it's for the best You've turned my house into a rat's nest I think you might know what happens next "And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell And if thy right hand offend thee, cut if off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell" I'm sick and tired of myself As I got rid of my friends I hoped this mess would've ended Instead, I've ended up a mess I guess you were just a part of the problem Cut your right hand to save the rest I hope it truly was for the best We've turned our house into a rat's nest I wish I knew what is coming next
5.
Barnburner 02:35
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A rigid noise An offset To balance 'tween not being pushed over And staying calm Trying to stand my ground Don’t wanna talk about it Just lean back And watch it all fall Don’t wanna talk about it Just lean forward And crash the very same wall I've just finished building I wanna say I've had enough But obviously I have room for more I force myself On things I hate To cover for My past and future crimes Don’t wanna talk about it Just lean back And watch it all fall Don’t wanna talk about it Just lean forward And crash the very same wall I've just finished building Don’t wanna talk about it Just lean back And watch it all fall Don’t wanna talk about it Just lean forward And crash the very same wall I've just finished building Crash the very same wall I've just finished building
6.
Mi Casa No Es Mi Casa 05:17
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"Bless those who curse you" And "Love your enemies" Was written in a book I've stolen I might have been fucked up A little too fucked up But it made sense to me then And kept me going I turned my cheek and Took a hit and Then returned back To complaining On and on and on Sing along with me Sing along with me So I can feel less lonely At least for a moment Feed my misery Feed my misery So I can keep on justifying My self-loathing We're on a brink of a big break Soon everything will surely change I feel repulsed By little things I used to really like Is it just me Or has this whole damn place Turned against me overnight? I swear can see these fucking walls are closing in on me As the house is getting ready to throw me up Sing along with me Sing along with me So I can feel less lonely At least for a moment Feed my misery Feed my misery So I can keep on justifying My self-loathing We're on a brink of a big break We need a little push A tiny little push And everything will change Everything must change
7.
You Know I'm Sorry 01:59
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I never meant to do any harm To you or anyone at all To you or anyone we know I thought that everything will work out For the best and as for the rest You know I'm sorry I wish there were less violent ways to learn Defloration of our youth Deconstruction of the truth I dropped out and you let go Loved the only way I know You know I'm a sucker for concern I never had what I thought I've earned I never had reason enough to learn I'm sorry you’ve burnt your fingers, but I'm the one who burns It hurts I burst Defloration of our youth Deconstruction of the truth I dropped out and you let go Loved the only way I know Dedicated to a myth Demolition of beliefs I am nothing but a man Love the only way I can
8.
There Will Be Weeping 03:14
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9.
And Gnashing Of Teeth 05:53
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Into the darkness Who's following whose lead? I'm so confused, but Soon enough, I won't be Talk all you want  I don't really mind But I still won't listen I'm deaf and I'm blind I keep myself busy Got my hands so full My vision clears Divided in two Surrounded by loved ones Family and friends I lied when I said I want it all to end Into the blood again Taking care of myself just like I was taught Allow me to be afraid And use what's left to stop Enter the bloodstream Into the light, then Back to dark I've found myself But I've lost my spark If not repulsion Then what would drive Me through the bleakness Of the adult life Completely stuck in The day to day I'm switching shades Form black to gray I start a fight I cannot win Just to get out of the State I'm in Into the blood again Taking care of myself just like I was taught Allow me to be afraid And use what's left to stop Got a baby devil on my hands With its devil's little tail And its devil's little horns Got a baby devil on my hands I will treat it like it's my blood I will nurture it like my own Got a baby devil on my hands I will live for both of us now I will build us a new home Got a baby devil on my hands Into the blood again Taking care of myself just like I was taught Allow me to be afraid And use what's left to stop I will stop for nothing I have mastered my destruction skills I really don't need any help I will stop for nothing I have mastered my destruction skills I really don't need any help I will stop for nothing I have mastered my destruction skills I really don't need any help I will stop for nothing I have mastered my destruction skills I really don't need any help

about

Finally... the first full-length album by Teen Brides.

All music were written and recorded in home studio in Saint Petersburg, Russia from late 2017 to early 2019. That was kind of a dark period for me and consisted mostly of struggling with mental problems, drug addiction, toxic relationships and, of course, poverty.

This work is an attempt to capture this particular period of my life without, on the one hand, harsh judgement, but, on the other, without romanticizing these totally unhealthy times too much. I believe it was only for the best that I've finished this album years later, so this story (or a part of my story anyways) feels more complete. For that purpose, I rewrote and re-recorded lyrics for two tracks in late 2022 while finalizing the record.

This life of mine was full of pain, no doubt, but I have to admit there was also room for a bit of joy. I hope I've managed to capture both of these sides of the story throughout the album. While lyrical themes are generally consistent, the music is pretty eclectic. I used different approaches to songwriting and arrangement, including ones I haven't tried before. While this record features several melancholic and sometimes acoustic parts, you would also find my angriest, heaviest and fastest tracks here.

Hope you enjoy it!

Oleg Komarov/Teen Brides, 2023

credits

released February 22, 2023

All music, lyrics, instruments and vocals, recording, mixing and mastering - Oleg Komarov

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all rights reserved

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Teen Brides Samara, Russia

Alternative rock/punk rock one man band originally from Samara, Russia. Currently based in Georgia.

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